Sometimes after making a statement you realize that the opposite is true. Maybe we tell ourselves things sometimes that are not true to convince ourselves that they are.
I don't think I'm a catalyst because even though I may want to change things I will also be changed by my experience. A catalyst, in a chemical sense, isn't.
Maybe I'm more of a catfish. Catfish has taken on a new definition because of the movie catfish that came out in 2010 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catfish_(film)
SPOILER ALERT. please go watch this movie it's good.
the definition has become someone who misrepresents themselves online or uses fake profiles to mess with people. If you watch the movie, that's not really what it says.
The definition comes from a story in the movie (on wiki page) Vince, relays a story of how when live cod were shipped to Asia from North America, the fish's inactivity in their tanks resulted in only mushy flesh reaching the destination. However, fishermen found that putting catfish in the tanks with the cod kept them active, and thus ensured the quality of the fish.
This is the definition I like better. Basically someone who stirs shit up.
So I'm not a catalyst, I'm a catfish.
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